Surviving (and Maybe Even Thriving) with Twins or Triplets

So you’re having twins. Or triplets. Or maybe just one baby who screams like three. Either way—congrats! And also: deep breaths. You’re not alone, and you’re definitely not doomed. Is it hard? Sure. Is it impossible? Absolutely not.

Here’s a little guide to surviving those first wild months with multiples. It's not exhaustive, but neither is your sleep right now. So let’s keep it real, keep it doable, and maybe even keep it funny.

1. Lower the Bar. No Lower. There You Go.

Let’s be honest—Instagram is lying to you. Coordinated outfits? Homemade purées? Matching milestone boards? Nope. Your only job is to keep everyone alive. That includes you. If you showered today, you’re winning. If you didn’t—still winning.

2. Shift Work = Survival

Sleep is a team sport now. You and your partner (or whoever’s in your support crew) should take shifts. Even if it's just a 3-hour nap while the other one is on baby duty—it matters. If you’re solo parenting, try to line up help (even just for a nap) from family, friends, or a postpartum doula.

3. Feeding Hacks for Multiples

Whether you’re nursing, bottle-feeding, or combo-feeding, it’s all valid—and all hard. Feeding two or more babies around the clock is no joke, so here are a few ways to make it a little easier:

• Use a twin nursing pillow to support both babies during breastfeeding

• Practice side-lying nursing at night (with support and safety in mind) to give your back a break

• Double bottle feed safely—you can hold both babies in your arms or across your lap and feed them together

• Hire an IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant). They can help you figure out tandem feeding, latching issues, and bottle alternatives—and many are covered by insurance

It’s ideal to feed both babies at the same time or one right after the other. This isn’t just a “survival trick”—it’s supported by experts. Coordinating feeds helps minimize caregiver exhaustion, supports more predictable sleep patterns for the babies, and helps prevent you from being stuck in a 24/7 feed-burp-diaper loop with no breaks in between.

It’s not about rigid schedules—it’s about stacking your wins and building a rhythm that works for your family.

Citations:

1. Hale, T., Bennett, C., & Marshall, K. (2018). Care Strategies for Parents of Multiples. Journal of Perinatal & Neonatal Nursing.

2. March of Dimes. (2022). Caring for Multiples. https://www.marchofdimes.org

3. La Leche League International. (2023). Breastfeeding Twins or More. https://www.llli.org

4. Accept Help (and Ask for It)

You know how people say, “Let me know if you need anything!” Say YES. Hand them a baby. Give them your laundry basket. Ask them to bring coffee. This is not the time for pride. This is the time for delegation.

5. Keep a Loose Routine, Not a Schedule

Wake windows? Great. Rigid schedules? Maybe later. Right now, aim for flexible predictability. Feed. Play. Sleep. (Repeat x2 or x3.) Eventually, they’ll get into a groove—and so will you.

6. Create a Safe Zone for You

You need a space—physical or mental—that’s just for YOU. A 10-minute shower. A walk alone. A scroll through TikTok without a baby on you. Recharging isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.

7. Build Your Multiples Village

There are people out there doing this too. Find them. Vent to them. Laugh with them. Ask what stroller doesn’t suck. Try:

• Twiniversity

• Multiples of America

• Local Facebook groups for twin/triplet parents

• Parent support groups through your hospital or local YMCA

• A postpartum doula (hi, that’s me 👋)

8. You’re Not a Bad Parent If It Feels Hard

It is hard. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just means you’re human. Some days, you’ll feel like a superhero. Other days, you’ll cry over spilled breastmilk and eat Goldfish crackers for dinner. All of that is normal.

Final Pep Talk

You’ve got this. You’re outnumbered, but you are not unarmed. You have instinct, humor, a whole lot of love, and maybe a bottle of dry shampoo. That’s enough.

And if you ever need someone to remind you that you’re doing amazing, or to troubleshoot how to burp two babies at once while eating a sandwich—reach out. You don’t have to do this alone.